Attack of the Fangirls
by destroyedparadise234
Summary: Just a quick one-shot dedicated to all YAOI fangirls & guys ! UTTER AND COMPLETE CRACK OOC-NESS  Sometimes it just takes a bunch of fangirls for two guys to finally take a hint rated T for Light's inner thought's bad language


**A/N: just a totally random one-shot dedicated 2 all the rabid YAOI fangirls(or boys) out there! X3 I 3 U!**

**Warning: as stated above this is for YAOI luvers (boyxboy, BL, male luvin, two hotdogs in a bun, understand!) and shall contain a small dosage of yaoi. Not enough to sedate someone looking for a story with an amazing plot with deep meaning, but enough to bring just a tiny smile to u :) mayb. Idk. Lol. For the sake of my laziness L let him and Light go out for a walk in the park and Light didn't object the handcuffs, ok? COMPLETE AND UTTER CRACK!**

**Summary: Light and L are spending time together when they encounter a little… obstacle that prevent them from going back to the HQ. What shall they do about it? For once Light is not as psychopathic and insane as usual :D**

"Talking"

'Thinking'

_Inner Light_

***…*…***

"You know, you should really go outside more Ryuzaki. A little tan could do you some good." Light put his hands on the back of his head and closed his eyes as he walked alongside L. It was nice being outside for a change; the breeze was wonderful, the now setting sun went through the closed eyelids a little bit, and it was quiet. No chain rattling since they kept a slow pace, no awkward stares since it was getting late and they were now walking alone together to the HQ, and no arguments. There were actually for once no arguments during the whole day, but no awkward silences either. They got to know each other more, well L learned more about Light and Light learned some tiny fragments about L that would no way lower his chances of survival if Light were Kira. It was nice.

Light opened his eyes and looked over to L. Now that he was standing up straight, Light talked him into walking upright for once since they didn't really need to think for today, Light could see that L was in fact a few inches taller than himself. The bags under his eyes weren't so profuse today since Matsuda forced him to sleep and take the day off today, how he did either Light wasn't too keen on finding out. His skin looked softer due to the warm weather outside and his hair looked shiny and silky under the sun.

'He looks more handsome than usual…'

_Make a move then… _

'What?'

_I said make a move dumbass._

'I can't just make a move! What if he doesn't like me back, it'll be too awkward! And don't call me a dumbass!'

_I can call whatever I want to call you. And what? are you going to tell him when the investigation's over and he has to leave? If you just do it now he might consider staying here in Japan since he'll have more time to think about it! See what I'm getting at pretty boy? Oh and by the way you sound like a teenage girl._

'Shut up! If you keep insulting me I won't talk to you anymore!'

… _you're not even supposed to be talking to me, dumbass. And you don't have to respond, besides you can't get rid of me you whiny little asshole. Just go for it!_

'Remember the last time we "just went for it"?'

_*~*Flashback*~*_

"Hey cutie, what's your name?"

"W-what?" the little blonde blushed and he focused his baby blue eyes elsewhere.

"Come on, just tell me your name. You look pretty cute. What are you doing out here all by yourself?" Light inched closer to the orange-clad teen. He looked only a year younger than himself. 'Strange taste in clothing, but adorable nonetheless.' He started backing up to the railing of the bridge they were on. Light stepped closer and noted the strange scars on his cheeks.

"I'm waiting for someone actually… my name is Naru—"

"IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE YOU'LL STEP AWAY FROM HIM RIGHT NOW!"

"Huh? Wait- what the fu-!"

"CHIDORI!"

_*~*End Flashback*~*_

Light shivered at the memory. Four years later and he still had the scars on his ass…

"Light-kun, are you alright?" Light blushed when he heard L say his name… His voice was pure se- oh right! Respond to the sexy panda's question!

"Yes, I'm fine Ryuzaki." Light sent him an award-winning smile that would surely have made any girl (or guy) faint from its beauty.

"Ok then." L just continued walking again.

'What. The. Hell? That smile should've had him begging at my feet to take him or to be taken by him! I'm Light freaking Yagami for god's sake! I'm smart, handsome, athletic, I'm freaking perfect!'

_Jeez, you sound like one of those crappy motivational videos that single old geezers use to feel better. And you wonder why people call you a narcissist, you prick._

'Shut up! Weren't you the one that said, "Just go for it"? well I just did it and he didn't even do anything about it!'

_That wasn't doing anything! All you did was smile, you self-conceited bastard! After spending months with this guy you would've known by now this guy can't take subtle hints you fucking idiot! Ignoramus! _

'. . .how many names do you have for me exactly?'

_73 and counting, actually._

'I see…'

Light was knocked out of mind rambling when he heard rustling behind him. Oh no.

"Ryuuga(1), stop walking right now." Light heard giggles and looked around. He checked his pocket for mace. 'Crap, I forgot it. I haven't been outside in so long I forgot to prepare myself for _this_ type of threat…'

"Light? What's going on?"

"No time to explain! Stand back-to-back with me and prepare yourself!" Light got into a fighting stance and L followed suit. Whatever it was seemed pretty serious, like he had come across this kind of threat before. As if on cue a group of figures began to surround the two. When they all stopped running around L got a chance to focus on who they are exactly.

…

…

…What?

L stood back up again and turned around to face Light.

"Ryuuga! You idiot get back into fighting stance-!"

L smacked Light upside the head.

Once Light got out of shock he smacked L upside the head in retaliation. "What the hell was that for? I try to protect you and you hit me!"

"Light, they're girls. Teenage girls. They don't look like they're trying to harm us either."

"Don't be fooled! I've had to deal with fangirls all my life! They're vicious I tell you, vicious! Look around you! Can't you see the evil gleam in their eyes? I mean look at- wait who the hell are you people?" When Light finally got a good look at the girls surrounding him he realized these were different girls. Well some of them looked the same but there were a lot of new girls now. Yes, Light keeps track of his fangirls.

"Um excuse me, but who the hell are you people?"

…

"I think they're brain dead Light-kun…"

"No duh, they're all brain dead. They're waiting for something…" Light ran his hand, ran it through his hair, and looked around. If this was his fan club they all would have fainted, but instead they just trembled a little and giggled. Who were they?

"What are they waiting for then?" L whispered in Light's ear. His warm breath made Light tremble a little but what he noticed more is that the girls seemed to squeal louder when they saw this. Maybe…

"Ryuuga, please do not be alarmed at what I'm about to do next."

"!"

_SMACK_

"WHAT THE HELL? Why did you just smack my butt, you pervert!" While L was busy yelling at Light, he noticed that some of the girls in the back fainted and some of them had blood running down their nose. 'I knew it!'

"Ryuuga listen to me. These are yaoi fangirls! One of the most dangerous species of fangirldom!"

"What the hell is yaoi? And why is it so bad that you feel the need that it is necessary to molest me?" Light blushed and opened his mouth, then closed it. This process repeated too many time for L's liking and decided to figure what this magical 'yaoi' is.

'Hmm…yaoi is apparently a very famous type of fandom considering the amount of girls here… and there are no guys in eyeshot meaning it is a fandom mostly enjoyed by females… Light has never seen these girls before meaning that they are only here now because he's handcuffed to me… but they're definitely not my fanclub, if they were they wouldn't have swooned slightly at Light's every move and they would have most likely maimed him for touching me…

They swooned when he groped me… that means…

…

Oh my.

Hmmm…'

L looked over to Light to see the male still blushing profusely. He did look quite cute like that…

'Maybe I can use this to my advantage… Light hasn't been taking any of my hints. I mean I brought him to the park to a field of roses shaped like a freaking heart for god's sake!'

"Well, umm… yaoi is, well—"

"Light…." Said person gulped loudly when he heard his voice being called in such a sultry tone. And with no honorifics too!

"R-ryuuga?" As soon as Light looked at L he regretted doing so. His eyes were half-closed and he had such a seductive smile on his lips. He was walking towards Light in a way that could only be described as predatorily. Once L reached Light he placed his hand on his cheek (**The one on his face**) and breathed lightly over his lips. It took all of Light's self-control to not kiss the detective. L then turned his head and whispered in his ear or so lightly.

"Light, what's wrong? Are you nervous…" Light forgot how to breathe for a second. He was sure he looked like a tomato right now but he couldn't concentrate on anything right now. L on the other hand, although a bit light-headed, could see that in the background some girls already fainted.

L smirked and traced the outline of Light's ear with his tongue. Light shivered at the touch. L then started to trace Light's neck with his tongue and started to suck on his pulse. Light felt his legs giving way had to grab onto L's shoulders. The extra weight shocked L a little bit and stopped his sucking to wrap his arms around Light. Light was snapped out of his reverie long enough to hear some squealing and some body's hitting the ground.

'What the?' Light looked around L to see the fangirls still surrounding them although their numbers weren't as much as before. 'L must have figured it out… no wonder he's doing this… I guess I should play along, that way we can get back sooner…' Light felt his chest tighten at the realization. 'He doesn't really like me…'

L reached Light's collarbone and bit it causing Light to yelp. L licked the spot as if asking for forgiveness before sucking on the spot rather roughly. Light wrapped his arms around L's neck before moaning loudly.

'Even if he doesn't really like me back, which is very unlikely since he's responding like this, I won't let anyone else have him or touch him like this. He's mine, whether he likes it or not.', thought L smugly as he eyes his work. L then trailed butterfly kisses up Light's jaw until he reached the corner of Light's lips. As soon as Light felt this, a red light went off in his head and pushed L away from him. L looked shocked to say the least.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. All the girls have fainted already, let's go." L looked around and saw that all the girls have already fainted. He was so into _almost _kissing Light that he didn't even notice the girls anymore. L felt the chain tug and saw Light walking down the path already with his bangs covering his eyes.

"Hey why are you—"

"Look! Your plan worked already, okay! Let's just get back now…" L saw tears running down Light's cheeks and stopped walking. Light didn't notice and fell backwards when the handcuffs pulled on him. L caught Light quickly and made the boy face him.

"L what are yo—"

Light was stopped in the middle of his yelling when L pressed his lips onto his own. Light tried to push L off but his hold on him was too strong. Even if Light's mouth was open at first L didn't want to push his tongue into his mouth yet. He wanted Light's permission first. L licked Light's bottom lip, asking for entrance. Light kept his mouth closed at first but soon stopped struggling.

'H-he's kissing me… why… we don't have to make anyone faint anymore so why… it feels nice…' Light parted his lips and moaned when he felt L's tongue massage his own. Both felt like their skin were on fire and after a few minutes parted when the need for air was too much. Light was blushing when he saw how L was looking at him after that kiss.

"S-stop looking at me like that…"

L giggled (yes L can giggle) and kissed Light on the nose.

"So… you really do like me?" L smiled while inner L facepalmed. L opted to kissing Light quickly as a confirmation. "Let's go home, Light."

"M'kay!" Light blushed as he held hands with L on their way home.

*...*...*

Light looked around before sounding out the bird call. "Ahoo! Ahoo!"

"Damn we need to make a cooler bird call. You sound funny." A bunch of girls walked to Light and crossed their arms.

"So ummm, thanks I guess for helping me and stuff hehe… okay bye—"

"Oh no you don't pretty boy!" one of the girls grabbed Light by his shirt collar while the others held him by his arms.

"Ok fine… what do you wants?"

"Well since we managed to get you with your guy and we had to pretend to faint during the process, some of us are not as skilled as others in the art of fainting resulting to some injuries, I think our request is quite lenient actually." The girls looked at Light with an evil gleam in their eyes.

"We want pictures. A lot of pictures—"

"And tapes! Don't forget the tapes!"

***…*…***

**Gahhh I noe it was lame XD sorry about the major OOC-ness but again I repeat this was YAOI CRACK **

**Sorry about the flashback part if you got annoyed with all the adjectives I was using to describe Naruto its jst I couldn't exactly say his name hehe… I couldn't help but add a little of Sasunaru love in here XD**

**Naruto belongs to Kishimoto**

**(1) In public Light has to call L Ryuuga**

**I hope you enjoyed my little tribute to all yaoi fans :D**


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